It’s that time of year again! Time to skip class, break out the only green t-shirt you own, and wake up before noon for the first time all semester. It’s finally St. Patrick’s Day – a weird, long and awesome day that doesn’t really make sense (do we even know why we’re celebrating?).
While everyone will be ready to party like a true Irishman or woman, not everyone will be prepared for the challenges the day might pose. If you want to survive St. Patrick's Day (mostly) unscathed, here are my top 10 tips for making it out alive.
1. Don’t go out the night before
This might seem obvious, but getting a good night’s sleep will ensure that you’re ready for the all-day St. Paddy’s bender. This leads me to tip #2.
2. Wake up early
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Rise and shine! No time to hit that snooze button today. Drinks will be flowing by 9 am, so make sure you’re ready.
3. Eat a big, greasy breakfast
Sorry, but skipping breakfast just won’t cut it today. Neither will light foods like smoothies or yogurt. Fill your stomach with carbs and the greasiest food you can find. Trust me, you’ll thank yourself for it later (and your liver will too).
Bonus tip: have a beer with breakfast… because when else is that socially acceptable?
4. Wear green
It doesn’t matter if green isn’t your colour. Be committed to the holiday. No need to be decked out in head-to-toe themed apparel, but you’ll stick out like a sore thumb in a sea of green if you don’t at least make a minimal effort.
5. Make sure your phone is charged
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Things will get pretty crazy and chaotic out there. It will be easy to get lost and separated from your friends in the crowd – especially when everyone seems to be wearing the exact same outfit. Make sure your phone is charged and ready to be used if that does happen. To be even safer, I recommend sharing your location with friends on “Find My Friends.”
6. Drink something Irish
Drinking genuine Irish alcohol seems like an appropriate way to celebrate St. Paddy’s Day. Whether that’s a Guinness, a shot of Jameson or an Irish car bomb, try an Irish drink, even if you have to pretend to like it.
7. Stay hydrated
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I don't mean to sound like your mom, but make sure to swap out your green beer for some water every couple of hours. Hydration is key, even if you have to take a pee break in the bushes every 30 minutes. Your new best friend, H2O, will keep the headaches away and it will make waking up tomorrow morning so much easier.
8. Have a mid-afternoon snack
I know it can be hard to remember to eat, and food might seem totally unappealing because your stomach will already be full with liquor. But eating something will give you the fuel you need to keep going.
9. No breaks allowed
Sounds counterintuitive, right? By the late afternoon, your body will try to convince you that you need to take a breather. Word of advice? Don’t stop. Don’t nap. You’ll never make it out again later. You’ll wake up from your quick “power nap” in the late evening, and you’ll have zero motivation to get out of bed. I’ve been there, trust me. Keep riding the St. Patrick’s Day momentum and continue powering through.
10. Don’t be an idiot
St. Paddy’s Day is supposed to be fun. Don’t be the person who goes from zero to 100 too quick and ends up in the hospital. Pace yourself. Know your limit. St. Patrick’s Day is a marathon, not a sprint, and you want to make sure you reach the finish line. Slow and steady wins the race in this case.
If you employ all of these tips on St. Paddy's Day, you'll be sure to survive the day and make the Irish proud. Once the celebration is over, it will finally be time to jump into bed, down some Advil and hope no embarrassing photos from the day end up on Facebook.